“Husband and Wife Training…”
We were blessed to be involved in Caleb and Sarah Altmeyer’s lives as they prepared for marriage. They called their premarital season “husband and wife training.” Here are some things they learned:
Restraint: Caleb (C): It’s a man’s responsibility to be the protector of a couple’s purity and not run to porn or anything else to feed his lower nature. He must learn to have God meet his needs.
Surrendering Control: Sarah (S): Negative life experiences caused me to build walls of protection around my life. Jim taught me to face my fears in a healthy way. Without his help, I would have ended our relationship numerous times.
The difference between character and romance: (C): Culture teaches us to be romantic from the start of a relationship. Romance can quickly win a woman’s heart, but the most important thing is to get to know someone’s true character.
Accountability: (C): I learned to be accountable to spiritual fathers and mentors who helped me learn how to lead, provide, protect, honor, and deal with the root causes of issues that surfaced in my life. (S): We invited people into our marriage to help us navigate this difficult and beautiful road called life.
Protection: (C): I learned to make Sarah feel safe—emotionally, physically, and spiritually—by being consistent in my relationship with the Lord, in my character, and in how I treated her. (S): Jim teaches that women are created for safety, security, permanence, and commitment. As I embraced my God-given design, I learned how fun it is to be a woman who feels safe for once in her life.
It’s not a list of “don’ts”: Instead of being a season of things we could not do, there were lots of things we could learn to do: (C): listen to Sarah’s heart, serve her, and protect her; trust God; become a trustworthy man; become financially stable; lead in faith, purity, integrity, and love. (S): encourage Caleb in his calling; speak blessing over him; pray for him; serve him; trust him as a provider; react in honor and respect; spend time with the Lord.
Visit www.lifeline-ministries.org to view an interview Jim did with Caleb and Sarah at our recent Unmasked IV Conference. You can also purchase their interview as part of a 5-DVD or CD Disc set.
Also available at the bookstore: Relationships 1 & 2 CD set: Keys to Godly Relationships. Many other great resources are available at our website.